Tam’s New Boots
Author: W G Lyttle
Date: 2012
Source: Ullans: The Magazine for Ulster-Scots, Nummer 12 Wunter 2011/12
We are grateful to our good friend Mark Thompson for the following poem, the text of which was handed to him by a lady attending his talk on Sir Thomas Smith at Ards Historical Society. Prompted by Mark’s message, our Honorary Vice-President Philip Robinson added a nugget or two of additional information: ‘This was an advertisement for McKee’s Shoe Shop in Newton, penned by W G Lyttle for the Newtownards Chronicle when he was with that paper. I think I have heard Will M‘Avoy recite it. I came across it when I was abstracting the Lyttle material from the papers.’
A used tae buy grate muckle boots
That made my feet nae shape ava.
An’ aye a stuffed the taes wi’ cloots
But aye the heels wud gang athraw.
A went tae Newtonerds yin Monday
An’ jest whun passin’ James McKee’s,
A stapt an glowered in his wunday —
Thinks I, there’s sumthin there wud please.
A’m shair a seen a thoosan’ pair
O’ boots an’ shoon o’ ivvery size,
An’ slippers bordered roon wi’ hair,
An’ nice wee patent ankle-ties.
A steppit in, a wee thin blate;
The mester lauched — A think he pent me.
He tell’t me fur till take a sate
An throwed a goat skin doon fornent me.
My shoon amused him ower ocht;
Sez he, my dacent man, A tell ye,
The shap, whaurivver them wuz bocht
At ony rate haes gien ye velye.
A wish ye seen the yins A tuk
An’ whun he rowled them up in paper,
He gied me sumthin back fur luck,
Altho’ Ah did not want them chaper.
Man, whun A put them on that nicht,
A thocht A wuz some ither buddy.
A felt that smart, an young an’ licht,
A cudnae stan’ yin minit study.
The fowk frae a’ the country roon
Cummed in an’ axed my boots tae see;
An’ ivver since they a’ gang doon
An’ fit themsels wi’ JAMES McKEE.
JAMES McKEE, PRACTICAL BOOT AND SHOEMAKER, 30 HIGH STREET, NEWTOWNARDS
